just try…

just try to sit still and listen to Regina Spektor’s Fidelity. The kids and I rock out to it just about every day and we can’t keep still! So fun! Listening to a lot of Regina and Jason Mraz lately. oooh and today I woke up and the old song, “oooh child things are gonna get easier. oooh child things are gonna get brighter…” was playing on the radio. I laid in bed and listened to it fully praying, “Please God let that be true”.

I’m having so much trouble getting going in the morning. I’m sure it’s because of my lack of thyroid hormone. blah

OH! Next month, Into the Wild comes out on dvd. Beauty!

So Jan. 1st I got back to dieting and joined Spark People with a few friends. The first week was real good and I had a 3 pound lost. Then… wouldn’t you know, girl scout cookies came in! Ahhhhh Darn you Samoas! Not to mention the day before I took Kate to the Pepperidge Farm outlook and bought a bag of cookies. I’m just hoping to not have a gain this week. A girl can hope!

Really into soup in the winter. Last night I made the copy cat version of Panera Bread’s Broccoli Cheese Soup. Rave reviews from those of us who tried it. Aleah turned her nose up. What the heck?! She loves that soup. I guess because I didn’t have a bread bowl the fun was taken out of it. She’s been such a brat lately. I wasn’t in the mood to argue. Sunday is the day of rest afterall! LOL

Currently reading this book, Serve God Save the Planet by Matthew Sleeth, MD. (Thanks mom and dad for giving it to me for Christmas.) I heard Dr. Sleeth speak at Mars Hill Church which I listen to via podcast. That sermon series interested me in the green movement. The gist of it is as Christians we believe the earth is God’s creation and he loves it therefore we need to love the earth. How does one argue with that?

If that isn’t reason to clean up our act, how about the alarming rate of illness in this world. Cancer and autism are the first thing that come to my mind. It’s hard to find someone who has not been affected by at least one of those medical issues. Could our materialistic culture be not only harming our spiritual well being but physical as well?!

And then you read about pollution in our water and Bisphenol A in our plastics and it’s alarming. Being a mother opens my eyes to what we are putting into our bodies. I want the best for my children. So when you know better, you do better. So last week I went over to the Corningware outlet and purchased a few more of my corelle bowls and got a storage set of Pyrex bowls with lids and began tossing out the plastic we store food and then microwave in. I’d lost all the lids to the bowls anyway so it felt good to do. Something that can be washed and reused over and over. Money is tight but this was a priority. And so were these…

Sigg water bottles. Aluminum bottles. 90% of the time our kids drink water every day.They just keep a bottle in the fridge all the time and I wash them out at night.

So those are the things that have been on my mind this past week. Trying to do better!

how?

How does the house get so filthy? I felt like this house was pretty darn clean on Christmas. I slacked off and two weeks later this place is frightening. It’s 1 am and I just got done scrubbing the living room floors which ended with me sitting here in tears completely overwhelmed by how much there is to do. Laundry to wash, fold, a huge stack to put away, floors to sweep then mop, dishes in the sink to scrub (dishwasher broke), fridge could stand a swipe down, toothpaste on the vanity, stairs to be swept, tub needs a scrub, toilet swish, kids rooms are a pit, Christmas decorations finally made it into boxes but now need to go to storage, dust on everything… sigh   And there is MORE! That’s just the immediate things. I have bills to pay, school paperwork and mail to read, thank you cards to write…….  calgon, take me away. Better yet, send Mr. Clean!

So in a nut shell, life is…

overwhelming.

sad.

boring.

emotional without my thyroid meds. My prescription ran out so I am taking a dose every other day. Going to the doctor is a luxury we can’t afford. I feel so weak.  It’s amazing how big of a difference those tiny little pills make in my life.

And then there’s my eyes. They ache every waking minute.

My faith is shaken.

hello little blog. remember me?

Hello again. It’s been a while. Let’s just get this off my chest.

No, I did not complete the 12 day Christmas tree countdown. Let’s just be honest. We knew I wouldn’t keep up! I accept this flaw about myself.

So HAPPY NEW YEAR! 2008 is going to be interesting. My future is one giant question mark.

So to resolve or not to resolve?  Every day I think about making a list of resolutions. And now I’ve realized, it’s so much easier to just type up the things I’m not interested in changing. Here goes:

I will continue to not smoke. I will continue to not get drunk or do drugs. I will continue to harp on my kids about bathing themselves and picking up their toys. I will continue to take lots of photos and little video snippets of our life… once my camera is repaired. I will scrapbook our memories and my thoughts on our life. I will continue to listen to music every day. I will read for enjoyment and knowledge. I will keep exploring who I am. I will do the best I can.